I want to share a story. My father-in law has lived in a senior's residence for 18 months and chose to move there following the death of his second wife Barbara. They had been married for 20 years and at the age of 86 he decided he would relinquish his drivers license and the condominium they had lived in in Perth and move to a residence very close to our home. My husband, Paul, singlehandedly took on this project and Doc was comfortably installed in his new home by the fall of that year. There were some tears still in those days, as he missed his companion and his home but gradually he now seems to have settled in and we get to be involved in the activities at his new home.
I had lunch with Doc last week at the Palisades and as opposed to previous times he led me to a table where someone was already seated. I knew he usually ate with 2 or 3 other gentlemen. I had asked him their names but several times he had stated that he couldn't remember. I was pleased when upon sitting down he introduced me to John. John too was in his 80's and dressed immaculately in a suit jacket complete with shirt and tie. It did not take long to realize that John had some difficulty hearing and as long as I spoke loudly enough things were fine. I noticed that Doc and John did not raise their voices to each other and it became clear to me that if not for me being there they would not address each other if it wasn't absolutely necessary. As our orders were being taken a slightly younger, less immaculately dressed gentleman took the remaining seat and proceeded to pull a litre of red wine from an lcbo bag and place it on the table. I waited several minutes and realized when an introduction wasn't being offered that indeed Doc, as stated to me, didn't remember his name. I casually introduced myself to Horace and settled in for an interesting lunch. The Palisades is geared to fairly independent seniors and looking around the dining room I noticed all levels of this independence. Since it was Easter I asked Doc about church services for the weekend. He said "oh yes they'll have a few of those. There are a lot of people here interested in eternal life". His very dry delivery hit a comic chord with me and I couldn't help laughing at his unintended pun. Our two companions were busy eating their soup and had totally missed his comment. They did wonder why I was laughing and I raised my voice and repeated his line and they both had a hearty laugh. I couldn't help wondering to myself how much fun they could be having if they could acutally hear each other.
Monday, March 24, 2008
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